Author Archive

>In India, there are an estimated 40 million widows. Ostracized and shunned by both family and friends simply because they no longer have a husband, thousands of them actually trek to the city of Vrindavan as tradition holds that dying there will free them from the karma of returning to such a fate again. They live on the streets, prohibited from re-marriage, heads shaved, wearing no jewelery or any color other than white.
   Some widows of India have begun to reject this condemnation, a creation of someone else’s reality, and by their own thoughts, words and actions, create a new reality in which they can live based upon their intrinsic value as human beings.  
   They are starting small, as with all such movements, by breaking free of the external definitions and limitations placed upon them. They are setting up shelters, growing their hair, wearing jewelry and colors, and daring to laugh and dance.
   The women of India are a wonderful example of how we co-create new realities and bring to us that which we really want. Whether it’s a reality we ourselves have created or one crated by another individual or group, the first step in changing what you’re experiencing is changing how you think about it. The second step is replacing what you have been experiencing with the new thought of what you want to experience. The third step is giving voice and action to your new creation.
   As you embark upon the creation of a new reality, it’s important to remember two key elements: First, that you must focus on what you are creating with all of your attention. Jesus said, Seek and ye shall find.”  He didn’t say “Dabble and ye shall find.”  When you seek, there is a concentration upon that which you seek that has pinpoint determination. To seek is to eliminate from your quest all that does not support your quest.  
   Secondly, know that your emotions are the energy that fuel your seeking. Seek with joy. Heaven and hell are states of being that we create within our own minds and manifest within our own lives. Whether in the thought stage or the action stage, go in pursuit of your creation with a song in your heart and a bounce in your step. Feeling otherwise just means you are not being true to what it is you really want…or who you really are.
   There are so many examples. Moses and the Israelites leaving Egypt, Rosa Parks and African Americans refusing to sit in the back of the bus, Lech Walesa and the Polish people standing for democracy. These and countless others have been way-showers lighting the way for how to create, and co-create, new realities.
   If you want to help the women of Vrindavan this day, it isn’t necessary to contribute money or join the Peace Corps. Instead take some time to create through your own thoughts, words and actions a world where ALL life forms are honored simply because of their inherent value and where joy is the prevailing emotion. 
   In my reality, this approach works.

      Former Vice-President Al Gore is going to spend this weekend hosting a globally televised Live Earth concert to try and heighten our awareness of the catastrophic dangers of global warming.
      His son, Al Gore III, has spent the past week receiving national media attention that should raise our awareness of the catastrophic dangers of the widespread use of prescription drugs.
      Recently, I was speaking with a neighbor in her mid-30’s with two young children.  My neighbor is quite social and has many friends in her age group, all with young children. During our conversation about the challenges and pressures of trying to raise children today, she casually mentioned that “90% of my friends are on anti-depressants.”
      This epidemic of prescription drug use and mis-use, as I see it, is not restricted to the young, although Gore’s arrest for marijuana use and illegal possession of prescription drugs is playing in the press and on the Internet that way.      
      The disregard with which prescription drugs are manufactured and sold, the abandon with which they are written, and the ease with which they are consumed are all national problems that transcend the generational divide. The elderly are over-medicated, the boomers are over-medicated, the X-ers are over-medicated, and it seems our school age children are as well.
      There are probably many ways to approach solving this problem. Most require a lot of time, a lot of money and a lot of political organization and power.  The fastest, least expensive and most empowering way, however, is for every one of us to take charge of our lives, our lifestyles, and our life choices.
      It’s not about locking up the pharmaceutical executives or locking up the medicine cabinet. Actions such as these just allow each of us to abdicate our part and our power.    
      Nancy Reagan was half right. “Just Say No” has to start with accepting personal responsibility and rejecting the quick fix of prescription drugs. It also means saying no to our doctors when they reach for the prescription pad.  It means not watching every third commercial on TV touting the latest cure-all for whatever ails us.  It means refusing to continue to live in ways that stress us out despite the fact that we know we’re doing it. It means adjusting our lifestyles to a more realistic pace. It means adjusting our diets to support wellness rather than expediency.      
      Be kind to yourself. Start small.
      Next time you have something as simple as a headache, reach for a yoga mat instead of an Excedrin.  If that’s too mystical and “out there” for you then just stop what you’re doing, get a pen and paper,  re-evaluate your day and identify where the headache came from. Most illness really does originate with dis-ease.  A lack of ease in your life born of choices that do not support a state of continued wellness and continued growth.
      Whichever route you choose, a yoga mat, pencil and paper, or just deep breathing…you’ll begin to change your pattern. This will be a new beginning and a good thing.
      More importantly, the children are watching.

>Having just celebrated Independence Day, I got to thinking about…you guessed it…independence!  The typical way we tend to think about it is in a political or societal context. But what I’ve been thinking about is independence of thought.
      We are so quick to take on the perceptions and definitions of those who came before us even though doing so stifles our own creative thinking. From our earliest childhood all the way through adulthood, we take on the “shoulds” and “coulds” and “possibles” and “impossibles” of our parents, our friends, and our leaders.  These automatic acceptances of other people’s perceptions and values become fixed in our minds and cause us to live a reality not of our own making.
      Where is that more obvious than in our systems of education…be they public or private?  Our 14 year old daughter is a very bright child academically. More importantly, she is a remarkably creative individual. She has attended both private and public schools. She frequently “sees” issues differently than most and sometimes tends to apply the English language with what I see as a “twist” of her own. When this happens I tend to correct her.  
      But where is it written that I’m correct? After all, isn’t her vision and her use of language just as valid as mine?  And where did mine come from anyway?  It’s likely I inherited them from those who came before me since it was only in adulthood that I really gained the confidence to begin to see and express things my own unique way in my own authentic voice.
      I’m not just talking about concrete matters like writing a book report or solving a math problem.  Even when it comes to spirituality and religion…don’t we humble ourselves before the dogma we’re taught or the mystic who came before us? 
   I heard a great line the other day. It went like this. “We’re each supposed to be creators, not regurgitators!”
   Think about that.
   Each of us is “created in the image and likeness of God.” What is God’s greatest and most profound act? Creation! If we each have but a smidgen of that capability, and I believe we do, then isn’t it incumbent upon us to use it by thinking and acting creatively?  What does that mean if not to see the world with fresh eyes, hear it’s sounds with new ears, and speak it’s words in ways that uplift and bring new meaning to our existence.
   I’m not much of an advocate of “No Child Left Behind” because it’s no different than trying to get everyone universal health care in a system that’s already broken instead of changing the system…and the approach…from treating sickness to fostering wellness.  
   An educational system that perpetuates the regurgitation of someone else’s definitions and perceptions is a system lacking creativity. The absence of creativity, in my view, is the absence of all that is at the core of this life.
   But this is just my way of seeing things. 
   If you disagree and see them differently…Hooray!
   Now there’s a reason to celebrate Independence Day.    

>;Ron Goldman, LLC has purchased the rights to the book (and all related rights) that O.J. Simpson wrote about how he would have done it if he had, in fact, killed the Goldman’s son Ron and Simpson’s ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson. As most will recall, a criminal jury acquitted Simpson of the murders but he was later found guilty of wrongful death by a civil jury before whom he was compelled to testify, an act he was able to avoid during the criminal trial under the Constitutional protection against self-incrimination.
   Fred Goldman, Ron’s father, teaches us an important lesson about the outcome of where we place our focused attention. 
   Fred Goldman and his wife suffered an incomparable loss, as no one would deny. Many people never recover from devastating loss and turn their sorrow and their pain against either themselves or others. Some, however, become single-minded of purpose and set a positive goal at which to direct their energies and from which they never waiver.   
   When all the reporters and paparazzi faded into the background, Fred Goldman remained steadfast in that the jury award the Goldman family was awarded would be collected, sooner or later. And while over the past decade or so there were many setbacks toward that end, his perseverance and single-mindedness of purpose has resulted in his sole ownership of what is likely the autobiography, and public admission, of the man who killed his son. The proceeds from the sale of that book and the making of that movie should go a long way towards satisfying the languishing civil award.
   I have a more positive, personal experience in what a focused intention can do.  
   At age 33, I decided to go to law school. Since I had been out of college for several years , I was deeply concerned that I might not be able to handle the workload or muster the academic resources to prevail though that infamous, grueling, first year. 
   So, I made a decision. I would not do or participate in or allow anything that took my mind off of my goal. 
   As an evening student, I spent the next year in classes by night and studying by day.  I literally did not eat in a restaurant, see a movie, go out with friends, or involve myself in any of my friends or family’s “dramas.” I spent the year learning and studying. 
   The result was that I not only survived the first year, I excelled academically.  My accomplishment was simply and clearly the result of my focused intention to succeed and my focused attention on what it was going to take to accomplish that goal. 
   The overriding message is that when we proceed with a focused dedication toward a clearly defined end it becomes easy, seemingly effortless, to make choices that support that end while avoiding
opportunities that would seek to obstruct it.
   Try it. Start small. Think of something you really want then put all your attention on it and see what you get. 
   In 1987 I got a law degree.
   Today, Fred Goldman got justice.

>I witnessed an amazing sight a few days ago while cleaning up my back yard. I saw an ant carrying off another ant. The second ant was dead.    
   As I watched what seemed to me a physically daunting task (afterall, the ant was carrying something it’s own size!) I was struck by the beauty of it all as I perceived it.  Here was a life form exhibiting some version of compassion for a member of it’s species. It was obviously headed back to the ant colony to provide the equivalent of a burial, or simply to return a fellow member of the group to it’s fold.
   When I shared my experience with my husband, he replied, “Oh, it was just taking it back to eat it. I’ve seen that on the Discovery Channel.”
   Talk about a punch in the solar plexus! In one fell swoop of a sentence my compassion turned to disgust. But did it need to?
   Fast forward to yesterday when I was engaged in a conversation with a bright, philosophical man who sees my perpetual positive attitude as, while noble, somewhat naive.  He believes that evil exists and simply not choosing to think about it or “give it energy” is dangerous.
   He made some good points and got me thinking. Temporarily, he even got me doubting.
   Then I took a deep breath, gathered myself back unto myself, and was able to see the lesson that mystics have known for ages and quantum physics has just recently been able to prove: The presence of the observer changes that which is being observed. Simply putting our consciousness on matter changes the behavior of matter.
   Now, back to the ant, my husband and my conversational exchange of yesterday.
   In my world, I placed my consciousness on the ant tending to it’s fallen comrade. And so, that is the effect of my consciousness on what occurs.  In my husband’s world, the ant is on his way to make a meal of his fallen comrade. And so, that is the effect of his consciousness on what occurs. In the world of the man who believes that how you think about evil will not effect or change evil…that is where he places his consciousness and so that is what he creates with it.
   I am not judging any of us or where we choose to place our consciousness. I do, however, believe that we are each living in a reality created by our thoughts.
   I prefer to think (and believe with certainty) that the ant was caring for the body of it’s comrade.
   In my reality, my thought and the ant’s action are inextricably tied to one another and in the end, both deeply matter.

>Yesterday I got an e-mail requesting that I speak to a group of successful male entrepreneurs in their 40’s. I also got an e-mail from a pro-Israeli political action committee asking that I sign a letter to the President asking the U.S. to stop sending financial aid to the Palestinian government. And then I noticed on CNN that the Israeli government is going to release funds to the Palestinians. 
    All of these are connected. Want to know how?
    The entrepreneurs don’t want me to speak on productivity or sustainability, the want me to speak on connectivity. They want to know how to feel less fatigued and more able to connect to themselves, their wives and their children.  I see this as a direct sign that there is hope for peace in the Middle East after all. 
    Of course, you’re saying to yourself, “Now there’s a leap.”
    Have a little faith, I’ll get there.
    Things change when a majority of people make up their minds, and place their attention and their actions on wanting them to change. 
    Think about it.  What is the likelihood that 15 years ago those same entrepreneurs would have been looking for a guest speaker to help them get closer to their families?  Maybe one…maybe two of them (at the most) might have had fleeting thoughts about the subject. But I’m pretty certain they would not have pursued a solution…and certainly not publicly and in a professional setting. But, at some point enough of them decided it was a vital and necessary path to pursue and so they are acting on it.
    It’s called “the tipping point”…some number within group behavior that when reached creates a change in the behavior of the group. That’s what happened with those entrepreneurs.
    That’s what I believe can happen in the Middle East and elsewhere.
    The political action committee thinks that cutting off funds to the Palestinians will curtail their ability to fund terrorist activity against Israel. Israel, on the other hand, seems to think that showing moderate Palestinians that they are willing to reach out and help them will create allies for peace. 
    I know there are those who say Israel has tried it before and this kind of faith never works. 
    I disagree.
    It wasn’t war that brought the Israelites out of Egypt. It was the contagious faith Moses had in a new outcome. It wasn’t war that made a 2000+ year impact on human consciousness, it was the compelling  faith Jesus had in a new outcome.  It wasn’t war that expelled the British form India, it was Ghandi’s faith in how to prevail.  
    There exists a tipping-point in the Middle East where enough people in the world will place there attention and their actions on peace as the most viable solution. 
    That tipping point could be me.
    Or it could be you.
      Have a little faith.
   
 
   

>I’m not inclined to be among the Paris Hilton media watchers, so I’m admittedly weak on the details of this saga. I do, however, know the big picture and I think it can be instructive for each of us, Paris Hilton included. 
      It all hinges on uncovering the higher truth, which is, that sometimes knowing Who You Really Are requires experiencing who you really are not.
      I think certain assumptions are fair. Paris comes from a wealthy, educated family and was blessed with the ability and opportunity to use her life and her talents in almost any way she could imagine. She appears to have made some less than wise choices thus far, and the latest one has been the most humbling. 
      I hope.  
      You see, when we get too far from our own center, from that place that holds our highest potential for growth, it can get very painful.  And while finding out Who You Really Are need not be painful, for some of us the pain can be a gift used wisely. 
      Even if you don’t know what you want, or aren’t even sure of who you are, having an experience that goes beyond the limits of what you do want to experience can be the fastest was to get those answers. Knowing where those boundaries are can help turn you in a more productive direction for getting to where or who you want to be. 
      Bringing meaning to negative experiences and applying that meaning in a way that positively impacts your life means that in the end, there are really no bad experiences. Just experiences. It’s where the saying comes from, “It’s not what happens to you, it’s how you handle it.”
      I believe in synchronicity. So, this week I’ve had the opportunity to live the words I am typing.
      Two days ago I had a really stressful day, physically and emotionally. My husband came home from work and, seeing my fatigue, suggested we go out to dinner and asked me where I wanted to go. Grateful for his suggestion, I thought that in return I would name a nearby bar/restaurant were I knew he could get what he would like…a roast beef sandwich and a beer.  Now, I’m a non-alcoholic drinking, vegetarian so my choices were going to be slim to none…but still.  
      When we arrived at the restaurant we walked in through the bar entrance.    
    It’s probably been 25 years since I was in a place like that and for good reason. Everything about the environment makes me uncomfortable. Sensing this, I ignored my feelings and pressed on. We were seated, ate dinner, and left. The whole experienced went on to be painful for two reasons.

      1.   I forgot to honor Who I Really Am and it negatively effected everything from the time we arrived until long after we left.

      2.   Once there, I didn’t handle it all very well.

      The good news is that I can look back at it and apply the meaning I found to positively affect my future. For sure, I’ll have another chance. Life works that way until you get it right.
    Next time I’m asked where I want to go, I’ll make sure it’s some place I really want to go. And next time I find myself in a situation that is uncomfortable, I will do what it takes to alleviate my discomfort rather than inflict it on another.
      The good news is that my husband and I have survived worse and always gone on to prosper.
      I wish the same for Paris.

>Twenty-five years ago I had a friend who liked to say that television would turn out to be the downfall of our civilization.  Richard was prone to hyperbole. 
   But about the same time, I was on temporary assignment in California,living in a rental apartment for 3 months with no television. It literally changed my life. (Not living in California…having no TV.) 
   For those three months, I found myself with more “spare time” than I ever had before. I got up at dawn, jogged around a neighborhood track (where I met new people), read more books and magazines (making me more interesting to talk to), browsed local shops (meeting still more new people) and walked the beach a lot, taking in and slowly appreciating the many faces of Nature.  It was a short span of time in my life, relatively speaking, but the impact of life without television was both enlightening and permanent.
   Television isn’t inherently good or bad. It just is. It’s like anything else…it’s how we use it…or how we’re used by it. 
   It’s obvious and easy to dismiss a lot of the meaningless and trashy shows that are available on any one of several hundred channels, but what about the more subtle effects of repeatedly seeing and hearing terrifying or tragic stories about things that take place beyond our immediate existence. Virginia Tech or Paris Hilton…do these events occur within your immediate world or impact the things you have to accomplish today? While I may not mind being informed about such things, and hopefully can in some way benefit from them or come to someone else’s aid, once informed, I don’t need to be subjected to the same story over and over when, in real time, it’s already over. 
   How does the repetition of history on an hourly basis support my living in the present? What does the investigation into the details of a mass murderer’s life do for me? And more importantly, what does it do for the children?
   I spoke with a friend yesterday who has a 6 year old son. At day camp, it seems he put his hands around his throat and said something at about wanting to kill himself…and the next day jumped in front of a go-cart after expressing a similar thought.  She loves her son and is rightfully concerned, yet doesn’t want to make too much out of it in case its just a “boy” thing and he’s trying to get attention by negative means.  In thinking about the incidents, she was repeatedly perplexed by “where did he ever hear talk like that?”  I don’t know that answer for sure, but he’s 6 and has a television in his bedroom. While she believes it calms him down, I believe otherwise.
   There are educational programs and programs with merit in all genres. They key is how responsible are we in discerning what nourishes us and what depletes and diminishes us?
   Some days I’m more serious than others. Today, looking back at what I’ve written, I seem serious. I could go watch TV to get my mind off of it all… but I think I’ll go read a good book instead. 
   Our 14 year old left for camp this week and packed 7 classics to read over the summer. I was elated.
   I’d like to thank the employer who sent me to California for three months 25 years ago for her choices.

>  With the 2008 Presidential election in pre-mature full swing, there is considerable talk unfolding about the need for universal health care coverage.  While I do not underestimate the need for emergency treatment in necessary situations, I am at a loss as to why we would be so intent on spending millions of dollars to make sure everyone can access a system that is in many ways, primitive.
   In fact, I think the question being asked is the wrong question. It’s not “How do we provide health care coverage for all?” but rather “How do we more fully explore and integrate the many alternative approaches to health and wellness that exist today?”
   The current system that our politicians are so eager to expand basically serves us in three ways: 1) it treats emergencies, 2) it intervenes after illness occurs and 3) it over medicates due to it’s economic and political relationship with pharmaceutical companies.
   Whether it’s energy medicine (“epigenetics” as explored in the recently released “The Genie in Your Genes by Dawson Church Ph.D.) meditation, relaxation techniques, homeopathy, yoga, prayer, or the myriad of other alternative choices…it makes a lot more sense to be pro-active and support health and wellness than to arrive late on the scene and try and minimize the effects of illness and dis-ease (my favorite way of spelling it since I believe that all disease originates from some form of stress to our systems…physical or eco).
   The media spends a fraction of it’s time and energy reporting on the successes of alternative therapies, yet we are inundated with the endless debate and various politically motivated positions of candidates on how to make the current, ineffective system available for everyone. 
   About 2 years ago I injured my knee in a fall. I got an MRI, saw an orthopedic surgeon and wore a soft brace for awhile. Then, this past winter, I slipped on the ice and re-injured it. It was hurting on and off so I got an x-ray and went to see an orthopedic surgeon again. He said he couldn’t see much on the x-ray, gave me a prescription for an MRI, and a large, supportive soft brace to wear until I saw him again. 
   I began to wear the brace and noticed that the knee was hurting more with it on. I also noticed that since I had seen him the knee seemed to be giving me more frequent difficulties.  
   Since I had just read a book on EFT(Emotional Freedom Technique), an alternative and emerging method of energy healing based upon sending piezoelectric signals through the connective tissue, I began to follow the method and “tap out” the source of the problem with my knee 3 times a day.
   My appointment with the orthopedic surgeon was yesterday and I canceled it. I had not gotten the MRI because my knee is fine. Since applying EFT, I have no trouble climbing steps, no pain in the knee, and no limitation.
   Now, I’m not delusional. I would not advocate that you can tap out a broken leg or cancer. But isn’t it time we became as advanced in our thinking about this topic as we are in the application of our technology.  Isn’t it incumbent upon us to open our minds to ways that differ from what we were taught and what society puts it’s stamp of approval on when the success rate of that stamped reality is woefully low and the side-effects and complications woefully high?  
   And who is to say what alternative approaches to that broken leg and cancer are out there waiting to be applied?
   Here’s what I know. The path to healing my knee was 1)free (unless you count the cost of the book); 2)self-reliant and self-administered, 3)put no drugs into my body with adverse side-effects, 4)required no surgery and, 5)didn’t need a referral from my general practitioner.
   I’d write more about all of this but my knee feels so good I’m going out for a walk.

>I gave my husband a GPS (Global Positioning System) for his car on Father’s Day. Yesterday, he told me that some auto dealers are now giving them away with the purchase of a new car. I have to admit, it is impressive. We drove our daughter to camp this past weekend and the GPS really gives you precise directions, and instantaneous recalculation, should you miss a turn. The one I got him also speaks the directions out loud in a clear, friendly voice.
   Did you know that each one of us is born with an internally hard-wired GPS? It’s called a “God Positioning System.”  
   The GPS for cars (and how it works) is just a mirror image of our own internal GPS. In cars, the basic data has to first be gathered, then input into software that upon your inquiry pulls up the relevant mapping.  If you’ve purchased the higher end model, the system then speaks to you…guiding you in the most direct way to get where it is you have indicated you want to go.  Should you get off track, the system knows it instantly, recalculates the new route based upon your new location, then advises you accordingly. Sometimes there’s a brief delay when it’s recalculating (I tended to become impatient when that happened).   
   The auto GPS, while advanced technology, is rather limited in comparison to the internal GPS.  Basically, the God Positioning System works the same way but with more extras. 
   Your internal system works this way. At birth (or before, depending upon what you believe) data is gathered (the possible places you may go and experiences you may have during your life) then the data is entered into the “software” (your consciousness).  During your lifetime, whenever you want to know how to get to where you want to be (career, values, relationships, health etc.) you simply turn on the GPS (access your consciousness), enter your desired destination, then receive the most direct and beneficial route to getting there. In fact, the internal system even has a friendly and loving voice that speaks to you as well. That voice comes through your own direct channel on the G-d frequency. No need for costly, maintenance-dependent satellites! 
   All you have to do is turn on your system, input the question, await the direction, and listen. As with the auto GPS, there may be a delay in re-calculation within your internal system. When that occurs, it simply requires patience on your part. You can be assured that once you clearly input your desired destination, the route will eventually be provided.  
   Listening is key to either GPS.  No matter how much you spend for the one in your car, or how much you say you are trying to access the one with which you are wired, unless you are willing to get quiet enough to hear the guidance, it’s not possible to benefit from the advanced “technology.”
   The truly amazing thing about your internal GPS is that the data input is being updated and revised instantaneously each second of your life. No waiting for some techie somewhere to acquire street name changes or add new lodging destinations to the existing mapping. Since God is the source of all of the information within your internal system, the latest and best data for your highest good is available at any moment, regardless of external changes to your environment or internal changes to your physical body. 
     I did a lot of research before I purchased the system I gave my husband. There are so many manufacturers, so many models, and such a large price range to choose from.  I probably spent about 10 hours all together.
   You can have the God Positioning System today. There’s only one manufacturer and all the models are free of charge. No shipping or handling costs added in, either.   
    Just turn on the system, ask and listen. 
    Oh, and during times of re-calculation, try and remember that patience makes all the difference.